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Tech Support for Relationships

10/4/2015

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         Communication is always important in any relationship. For years technology has made it easier and faster for all of us to communicate. Cell phones and face time have made it possible to stay connected with loved ones and maintain closeness no matter the distance. However, sometimes a good thing can create a new problem. “Phubbing” is a word hybrid for phone snubbing, defined when you are more into your phone than your conversation with your partner. It’s a new conflict for couples since your phone becomes a third wheel in your relationship.
         These are some signs that you’re phubbing your partner. When you’re having dinner with your partner, you answer your phone. You’ve shushed your partner because you were trying to finish watching a youtube clip. You’ve hugged your partner with phone in hand. A nice quiet evening with your partner has been interrupted by the sound of a beep/ding and you running to your phone.
         With technology these days, it’s becoming more common that we have a closer relationship with our phone than with our partner. If you literally count the hours that you spend with your partner versus your phone, whether it’s browsing the net, watching videos, or posting on instagram, which number would come on top? I’m not here to judge because it’s an honest truth to admit this to yourself and can be a helpful admission to your relationship. So here are some ways to make phubbing less of a problem in your relationship.
  1. Schedule to have alone time with your phone once a day. This time should be uninterrupted time where you and your phone have privacy away from distractions of your relationship.
  2. Have a conversation with your partner about the significance of your phone, and how your partner’s needs are negatively impacting your relationship with your phone.
  3. Let your partner know how your phone feels excluded when you are having fun or spending time solely with your partner.  
         Relationships need understanding, compromise, and acceptance. ​ Essentially, if you are able to help your partner understand the importance of your relationship with your phone then your partner will eventually come around to compromise and accept that he/she shouldn’t come in between you and your phone. 
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